Expanding Joy Coaching

I highly recommend watching this short but powerful film on a service dog named Rip Curl Ricky. It is a powerful testament to the value in letting go of trying to be someone you are not and embracing your unique gifts and talents. Get a nice big box of kleenex and enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=BGODurRfVv4

One of the practices I highly recommend to clients when they 1st start on the path to Consciously Creating their life is creating a habit of appreciation. Remember, through the Law of Attraction, what you focus on grows, so the more time you spend appreciating, the easier it is to notice other things currently in your experience to appreciate and the more things you will attract in to appreciate in the future.

Like any habit, the more often you do it, the easier it becomes. A great way to create this healthy habit is to commit to a daily practice of appreciation and find a friend or loved one who is willing to practice it with you. One of my favorite ways to do this is to pick a consistent time each day… at the dinner table, right before bed, at lunch break… and ask each other the question…”What’s going well today?” or “What would you like to appreciate today?” Then each person gets a chance to list off all the things that are going well or that they appreciate that day.

At first this can seem a bit challenging, especially if you have been practicing the habit of “What’s going wrong?” for quite a while. But keep with it and keep encouraging and supporting each other. Before you know it you will be focusing on what is going well all throughout the day and chomping at the bit to get to your appreciation meeting in order to share the exciting news with your friend or loved one.

…then be the partner that you want to attract in.

So often I hear from clients and others that I support that they are fed up with their current partners or prospective partners. So in order to attract in that perfect partner, we work on getting clarity on what they do want. The list is often familiar: someone that respects me, someone who is honest, has integrity, communicates well, in open to new things, loves me unconditionally etc. etc.

After that list is made, we take sometime to look at how they are showing up in their current relationships. Many are very surprised to find that they are not exhibiting all the traits they are looking for in a partner themselves. Now why is that relevant? Remember friends, who you attract in is always a direct reflection of what you have going on yourself. So if you are not exhibiting the traits you want to see in your future partner, how can you attract in that partner. You are not a vibrational match to them.

So, if you truly want to attract that perfect partner in… then as with everything, you have to start with you. Start cleaning up how you are in your current relationships. If you want someone who is unconditionally loving to you. You first need to unconditionally love all the others in your life… including yourself. If you want someone who is an open and honest communicator, start communicating openly and honestly with all those you care about. If you want someone who is punctual and reliable. Start being that punctual and reliable person in your current life.

Remember, you always attract in that which is a match to your current vibration. So if you want to experience it in another, your work first is to experience it in yourself.

This is a wonderful story about remembering to keep perspective about what really matters.  My dear friend Rusty shared it with me, and now I am sharing it with all of you.  Enjoy!

The Mayonnaise Jar

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle,
When 24 hours in a day is not enough;
remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
and had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
and start to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured
it into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again
if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand
and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded
With an unanimous ‘yes.’

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table
and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively
filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.

‘Now,’ said the professor, as the laughter subsided,
‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things – God, family,
children, health, friends, and favorite passions
Things that if everything else was lost
and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the things that matter like your job, house, and car..

The sand is everything else –
The small stuff.

‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ he continued,
‘there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for the things that are
important to you.

So…
Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play with your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.
There will always be time
to clean the house and fix the dripping tap.

‘Take care of the golf balls first –
The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.’

One of the students raised her hand
and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled.
‘I’m glad you asked’.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.’

A client referred to the Serenity Prayer during a session the other day.  This lead to a powerful discussion about the wisdom within this beautiful prayer.  I never saw it’s wisdom so clearly.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Serenity is Peace.  Peace is created by knowing that it is not the world that causes suffering but our belief systems about the world that cause our suffering.

Acceptance is the first step to peace.  What can you NOT change? Other people.  Outer circumstances as they are this minute.  Suffering is caused by wanting things to be different than they are.  Pushing against what is.  When you accept all that is, just as it is,  and letting go of needing to change anything outside of yourself to find peace… peace finds you.

What can you change?  You… only you.  You can change your beliefs.  You can change your perceptions.  You can change your responses.  You can change your attitude.  You can choose to see this world as hostile or see this world as loving.  Courage is found in the realization that you always have choice.

This wisdom is always within you… guiding you to Truth.  Your authentic self knows the difference.  What I can’t change – them… out there.  What I can change – me… in here.  It’s that simple.  Serenity is that close.

And the most amusing part of all…. when you find the peace you have been searching for within, which is where it always was anyway, then through the Law of Attraction, you will effortlessly attract in all the things you thought would bring you that peace in the first place.